Dirt Trails

My vacuum cleaner tells a tale. This little studio apartment doesn’t get cleaned often. Only when the whim strikes me or the impending threat of visitors motivates me does the evidence of existence get cleared away. But when that catalyst comes my vacuum tells a tale.

The voice of my vacuum speaks of my foot traffic. A steady hum that raises into a knocking of whiling dirt where many a sole has tread. The threshold is raucous, of course, but there are other patches that accuse me. Underneath the computer desk sends mixed messages speaking of both work and play, creation and folly. Others, however, do not speak so kindly. The place in front of the television asks me the purpose of spending hours watching the adventures of Hiro and Ando and seeing Frodo go up that mountain one more time. The dirt before the fridge asks me why I feel the need to examine its contents repeatedly when I know there is nothing of substance to be found save a half empty jug of milk and the long neglected veggies bought with the best of intentions.

Yes, my vacuum cleaner mocks the habits of this solitary bachelor yet reminds me of the life lived elsewhere. That loudest of noise raised at the threshold reminds me of where all those rocks and dirt came from. It tells of miles walked outside these confines and the steady accumulation of time to be carried back through the door at days end. The wilderness leaves its mark on the sanctuary and both speak clearly of the passing of time.

 

The Trouble With Second Life

I don’t really play MMO type game.  That is partly because I don’t want to commit the level of time required for most of them and partly because I don’t have Internet in my home currently.  I did have a thought about them tonigt, though.

A few years back a new virtual world was launched called Second Life.  This online game made a lot of us gamers scratch their heads because, really, it’s not a game at all.  It was simply a virtual space where participants can do just about anything they want.  They can interact, build, and create but there are no objectives, no rules, and no opposition.  In other words, the participants in this world had now purpose for being there other than the purpose they assigned themselves.

While a lot of groups like embassies and educational institutions have taken shots at using this world in good ways for the most part the world has lead to the logical conclusion of a world without restrictions and with complete anonymity.  In a way, it brought out the worst in people.

I would argue that the degeneration of this world is mainly a result of its lack of an overarching purpose.  Furthermore, I would argue that this happens much the same way reality.  Both games and life need to have a greater purpose (even if it is an abstract one).  Without a greater purpose we have no motivation beyond self-gratification.  We drift aimlessly from one experience to the next.  Even the most grind-heavy, repetitive MMO works towards an objective and even the most boring of tasks in life can be bearable if they are done for a purpose.

 

Obeying Too Much

Recently I have been re-listening to a lot of old episodes of the This American Life podcast. One of those episodes was one with stories themed around the Ten Commandments. In the story based on the commandment “thou shall not commit adultery” I was presented with this idea: it may be possible to obey too much. In other words, often we can lead ourselves astray by adhering to the straight and narrow too strictly. In this story author David Dickerson talks about his experience during college trying to control his lustful thoughts. It became an obsession for him and the more he struggled to repress his thoughts the stronger they became. His efforts to rid himself of sexual thoughts he ended up becoming obsessed with sex and he felt like a monster because of it. Eventually he realized that his agonizing over maintaining a righteous mind served to do nothing but distract him from every other aspect of his spiritual journey. The result of this obsession is that we do not bend to temptation but instead strain ourselves until we crack completely.

This idea, I believe, applies to much more than sexual temptation. It can apply to any kind of moral transgression we could be tempted with. Of course we shouldn’t give into temptation whenever it comes (that would be ridiculous) along but the moment we begin to obsess over the temptation we have lost to it. Bending will become cracking and we will find ourselves worse off than ever before.

We are all wretched sinners but we are saved by the grace of God nonetheless.

Thoughts?

Recently I have been re-listening to a lot of old episodes of the This American Life podcast. One of those episodes was one with stories themed around the Ten Commandments. In the story based on the commandment “thou shall not commit adultery” I was presented with this idea: it may be possible to obey too much. In other words, often we can lead ourselves astray by adhering to the straight and narrow too strictly. In this story author Dave Dickerson talks about his experience during college trying to control his lustful thoughts. It became an obsession for him and the more he struggled to repress his thoughts the stronger they became. His efforts to rid himself of sexual thoughts he ended up becoming obsessed with sex and he felt like a monster because of it. Eventually he realized that his agonizing over maintaining a righteous mind served to do nothing but distract him from every other aspect of his spiritual journey. The result of this obsession is that we do not bend to temptation but instead strain ourselves until we crack completely.

This idea, I believe, applies to much more than sexual temptation. It can apply to any kind of moral transgression we could be tempted with. Of course we shouldn’t give into temptation whenever it comes (that would be ridiculous) along but the moment we begin to obsess over the temptation we have lost to it. Bending will become cracking and we will find ourselves worse off than ever before.

We are all wretched sinners but we are saved by the grace of God nonetheless.

Thoughts?

 

Is It Good?

“Hence, in all true Christian asceticism, that respects for the thing rejected which, I think, we never find in pagan asceticism. Marriage is good, though not for me; wine is good, though I must not drink; feasts are good, though today we fast.”

- C.S. Lewis in “Some Thoughts”

I think that I would like to throw out one more post and then put a lid on this whole discussion of the use of Christian profanity. I am finding that the general consensus has been that its use, indeed, has its place. Used properly it can be an effective and powerful language tool and can even be considered good. At the same time, though, its usage must be carefully measured out lest it lose its force or be used for ill.

When you think about it, this is really the way that Christianity looks at much of what we find in creation. Many things are naturally good when treated properly (sex, alcohol, food, etc.) but can be turned to evil when abused. This is what separates Christian asceticism from the asceticism of other beliefs as well as from the puritanical abolition that is often are mistaken for Christian asceticism. Self control is a fruit of the spirit and is key, not only to the Christian life, but to a healthy life in general. Lewis said it well in the aforementioned essay:

“Because we love something else more than this world we love even this world better than those who know no other.”

Previous posts on this subject here.

 

Biblioburro

You know, it is things like this that give me a bit of hope for the future of this world.

This is from Rocketboom (www.rocketboom.com) which is one of the best webcasts I have found in years.

 

Everybody is Talking About It

It seems like everyone is talking about the use of Christian profanity recently.  I came across another take on it today on the Burnside Writers Collective:

“Watching Our ******* Mouths”

Of particular note is how they take into consideration what do to when writing publicly (like, say, I do):

For many of our readers, discussions of profanity preach to the choir.  I’ll admit my own language can, on occasion, fall certainly on the wrong side of the line.  The boundaries between my close friends, or old Army buddies, have been blurred over the years.  I’ve made jokes in my private life I’d never post here.  Partly, this is because Burnside is public: anyone from family to potential employers can look back through our archives…my gestating daughter will likely have access to what I’ve written decades from now.  Mostly, though, it’s because there are things I’ve said I’m not proud of.

My guess is, I’m not alone.  Especially when it comes to the readers of this site.

Further, when deciding Burnside’s policy on censorship and profanity, we have to remember potential advertisers.  We have to remember we’ll be linked to from any number of more conservative sites.  We have to remember children might stumble across our pages.  Regardless of our personal beliefs on profanity, it’s simply considerate to remember these things, as well.  At the same time, this is still our site, and we want to be honest about ourselves and our communication.  We like pushing the boundaries of typical Christian media, of being able to say things and address topics other sites can’t.

I’m still curious to know what all of you think about this.

 

Forgiveness and Damnation in the Fog

As a result of continued budget restraints I find myself talking more and more about older game titles (the ones you can find in the budget bin at GameStop).  At the same time, though, I have been finding a lot of games that have offered strikingly profound experiences.  The most resent of these has been with the game “Silent Hill 2″ on the Playstation 2.

Silent Hill 2 is a horror-survival game that takes place in the small, American town of Silent Hill.  The moment you enter this town you know immediately that something is a little off.  For one, the town is almost completely devoid of life and covered in a thick fog that never seems to lift.  The atmosphere of the game swiftly covers the player in a blanket of isolation and dread that pervades the entire game.  Even when you do occasionally encounter the few other human beings in the town they do little to abate these feelings.  In fact, after a while their unreliability and clear indications of mental unbalance begin to make the player’s character might be insane himself.

This is what Silent Hill 2 does so well.  With nothing more that atmosphere, symbolism, and subtle suggestion the game can influence the player to think in certain ways.  As Ben “Yahtzee” Croshaw put it, it tells a story without words.

As the player progresses through the game they begin to understand that this town seems to attract those who carry with them great guilt over their past actions and incarnate for them a hell of their own creation.  It is the most subtle of choices the player makes while progressing through the game that determines whether the character will find forgiveness and acceptance for his past sins or whether he will embrace his damnation and be forever lost.

It is this theme of choosing between forgiveness and damnation that I found so profound in the games story.  I found it especially had parallels to real life given the context of my own Christian faith.  Contrary to what seems to be popular belief, salvation in Christianity has very little to do with leading a “good life”.  Instead, Christianity acknowledges that every one of us has done wrong and gives us the choice to either accept our damnation or embrace the opportunity for forgiveness and redemption that is offered to us.  It is a choice that we all have and it is a choice that we all must make whether we want to or not.

 

Race and Gaming

I just read through a very interesting article on Kotaku.com about race, how it is depicted in video game design, and how non-white gamers experience gaming culture.  Go read it here:

Minority Report: The Non-White Gamer’s Experience

I found it especially interesting to contrast the way a black character is depicted in the games “Left 4 Dead” and “Gears of War”.  Two very different characterizations.

What do you think?

 

Types and Tastes

There has been this odd ongoing conversation going on between Evan over at Blog of a Once Dead Man and myself.  Not too long ago I finally got him to start playing Persona 4 (the game that unexpectedly became my favorite game of all time so far) and an odd reoccurring theme has popped up in our discussions.  It wasn’t the game-play or the impact of the story (which I have discussed here before).  No, it was our choices in relationships.

As I’ve mentioned before, Persona 4 has a very well written social simulator tied tightly to the RPG game-play that allows your avatar to learn about and develop relationships with the other characters in the game.  Along with this comes the option of starting an exclusive romantic relationship with another character.  In my play through I chose the character Chie Satonaka while Evan chose Yukiko Amagi and it wasn’t long before he and I started discussing why we made these choices.

Of course my first thought on this conversation was “we must be some silly Yankee Otakus to talk about fictional characters like this” but then I remembered how I had previously wrote that the character I played out through my avatar was really a reflection of the person I am in the real world.  This subject works much the same way.

At any rate, as Evan and I progressed through the game we both found ourselves going towards the girls that were “more our type” and this colored our perception of them.  I was drawn towards Chie because I saw in her personality a trait that is very dominate in my own—namely the trait of the protector.  In the game Chie feels a strong drive to protect her best friend Yukiko and sometimes falls victim to the pride and insecurities that come with that.  This is something that I felt was a very close reflection of my own feelings and actions towards those I am close to in my own life.[*] Really, it is this ability to connect back to real life that will most often endear me to characters in stories and this connection did not happen with the character of Yukiko like it did for Evan.

Now, if I may be so bold, I would like to ask Evan to take a moment and respond.  What has been your experience with this while you’ve been playing?  Also, if anyone else has had a similar experience I’d love to hear about it in the comments.

Update:  Evan’s response has been posted in the comments bellow.  Go read it already.

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[*] There were other aspects of Chie’s personality that I enjoyed like her sometimes confrontational nature and tendency to get embarrassed easily but the aforementioned was the most profound.

 

I may have been wrong

So there was a post I wrote awhile back about swearing.  Well today I came across an article on relevantmagazine.com on the same topic entitled “Watch Your Mouth“.  The thing is, I don’t know if that article is proving me wrong or if it is saying the same thing I was in a different way.  Perhaps I need to improve the clarity in my writing.

Excerpt from my post:

As a result I have had to re-evaluate how, when, and where I use certain aspects of my vocabulary.  For instance, I’ve put some thought into why certain words are considered profane.  There are certain common phrases that I will not use because they are in fact swearing in the classic sense.Basically, I will not use any phrase that is disrespectful to God or to any other person.  Other words, though, change status on a generational and cultural basis.   There are many words and phrases that, in a certain time or location, are terribly offensive but in another are completely acceptable or even meaningless.  Words like this I am more lenient on usage.

The primary thing I take into consideration each day is my audience.  I do not wish to insult, offend, or cause anyone to stumble so I am very careful about adapting my vocabulary to the audience at hand.  It is something I try and keep to the forefront of my mind and I am often bugged by people who are flippant about what runs out of their mouths with total disregard to those that may be within earshot.

Excerpt from Relevant Magazine:

Not using profanity in today’s world is noticeable. It’s the sort of abstaining activity people will take note of. What an opportunity for Christians to truly show restraint and demonstrate the difference of the Christ-like life! We shouldn’t chastise non-Christians for using bad language or avoid movies or music with salty language, but we, as Christians, should set an example by being different.

Certainly the case can be made that a well-placed swear word might be appropriate for a Christian when no other word will get across an idea or express a certain level of emotion/emphasis. Some of my favorite Christian artists will occasionally throw an expletive into their lyrics to really drive home a point.

David Bazan, for example, in his Pedro the Lion song “Foregone Conclusions”:

And you were too busy steering the conversation toward the Lord /
to hear the voice of the Spirit, begging you to shut the f— up.

Or Over the Rhine, in their beautiful song “Changes Come”:

I wanna have our baby / Somedays I think that maybe / This ol’ world’s too f—-d up / For any firstborn son.

And most recently, Derek Webb caused a stir when his record label refused to include the song “What Matters More” on his new CD because of this lyric:

‘Cause we can talk and debate until we’re blue in the face / About the language and tradition that he’s comin’ to save / Meanwhile we sit just like we don’t give a sh— / About 50,000 people who are dyin’ today.

So there is definitely a place and a time for a well-placed cuss word. But it has to be used sparingly and with a real meaningful purpose behind it.

Guess I will just let all of you decide.